Saturday, December 11, 2010

thowe -
i the gairden
the treen haud forrit




thaw -
in the garden
the trees step forward

12 comments:

  1. I love line three!

    With a smile,
    Angelika

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  2. line 3
    well done

    much love
    gillena

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  3. first thaw
    teeths
    chattering

    excuse me for that,

    nice collection; really loved that "all the trees, one blossom" :)

    wishes,
    devika

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  4. i mean **teeth

    wishes,
    devika

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  5. line 3 - a big surprise - kind of threatening somehow

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  6. Fine vision, John. _m

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  7. and too Dev "teeth's chattering - the chattering of teeth :)

    couldn't resist this one

    much love
    gillena

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. Gillena, i understand...but let me clarify with John's permission,

    my "teeths" was an error because i meant to say plural and missed teeth was the plural of tooth :)

    and then i left "teeth/chattering" because it conveyed more of the "present" effect of the action...at that point in time (not now)

    But I agree, the chattering of teeth also works fine...but there's still a light shift about conveying the severity,

    but basically my usage did not mean to say teeth's chattering...which means the "chattering of teeth"

    anyway, thanks Gillena...infact my brain is a little slow in storing all the grammatical rules...so it helps (It is a wonder that I am a paid freelance/ghost writer! :)

    Thanks John for the space,

    wishes,
    devika

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